The book covers say “Stormy Lane McKnight,” but most places online I’m just Stormy or, if we’re looking at handles, “thatstormygeek.” If you’re feeling stalkery, there ya go. If I have an account on some social media platform, that’s what you’ll find me under. Fun!
The geek part, of course, refers to my habit of playing games – usually of the video variety, but I have been known to spend hours huddled over a board game or invested in a tabletop RPG campaign. All of this to say that I tried my hand at streaming of the videosgame for a while. It was an interesting experience, for sure, and not something I could have seen myself doing back in the day.
Keen-eyed readers will have noticed the past-tense in that previous paragraph. After spending a couple months as a Twitch affiliate, I decided to offboard and erase my clips and VODs. It ate a lot of time and energy that I needed to spend on other stuff (say, writing?) and it was the catalyst for a mental health rollercoaster that I could not afford.
Those who know me were unsurprised when I mainly streamed zombie games. Twice a week I played Dying Light with my partner. We eventually added a Friday afternoon stream of 7 Days to Die. After my kid expressed an interest in Postal and I downloaded the first game (because free game – hello!), a friend suggested I stream that, so I did a blind playthrough of the first Postal game on Tuesday afternoons. Once that was finished, I went on to Postal 2. My final stream, I wrapped up Apocalypse Weekend and began my journey into Paradise Lost. And even that game had turned into a fucking zombie game (not that I’m complaining).
I learned some surprising stuff during my short stint as a “professional” gamer. One of my more unexpected realizations is that I don’t actually hate the sound of my voice. I always thought I did, but much of that was because it was “wrong” for my assigned gender. It’s not exactly what I’d like it to be, but I also don’t cringe when watching playbacks of my gaming sessions. The thing I never would have imagined I could say is that regularly being on camera, speaking to an audience of however many, for hours at a time, multiple times per week, was something I didn’t absolutely hate. Not the most ringing endorsement, I know, but considering my anxiety about making phone calls and speeches and generally just interacting with people….yeah. Didn’t hate it? Is amazing.
There’s no real profound point to this post. I just realized I hadn’t put anything up in a while and wanted to check in, let y’all know what’s been going on with me. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving here in the good ol’ US of A. In non-covid times, I would be heading to my mom’s house to eat too much food with my partner, kid, brother, mom, step-dad, and whichever of my step-dad’s kids decided to show. This year, though, well…we’re staying at home. The positive is that I feel free breaking with tradition and doing ham instead of turkey because I really don’t like turkey. We’re going to try to do a video chat, maybe some long distance gaming, with my mom and brother, but I don’t know if that is a thing that will happen.
The scary thing, of course, is that many, many people in this country are going to spend time with many, many other people tomorrow. And the following day when they kneel at the alter of consumerism that is Black Friday. Hospitals are already bursting at the seams and we’re looking at covid numbers shooting through the roof. This is all so depressing, especially because it didn’t have to be this way.
Hug your loved ones tight if they are in your quaranteam. Don’t miss a chance to tell your loved ones how you feel. And from my family to yours, best wishes and stay safe out there.
Categories: general musing
Stormy Lane McKnight
Writer of trashy queer superhero romance, smutty sci-fi, and other things that are gay af. Disaster enby and all around bisexual wrecking ball.